The University of British Columbia Okanagan is many things to many students. For some, the years they spend in the spaces here at the university could very well be the best years of their life. For others, this might only be a stepping stone to a successful career. In both cases; however, students are stuck either enjoying or suffering through their time at UBCO and while using its amenities. Therefore, it is important to know what students think about the spaces on campus. As I rifled through google reviews, I found some to be quite inspiring and others to be absolutely negative. I decided to compile the funniest google reviews I found about the spaces at UBCO and share them with our community, in hopes of lightening student spirits before the stressful exam period approaches:
- The Hangar
Killiam Linel
2 years ago
3 stars
“Lots of jabronees with fancy hair trying to get their instagrain and snappea stories swoll instead of their muscles, so it was hard for me to navigate around and get some proper gains. There were also some lot lizards posting up by the cables doing more talking than sweating. Besides that staff was nice and the equipment is new. On a scale going from dumpster to mount Olympus, I'd give it a Knox Mountain.”
- Subway
Adam Burrows
5 stars
2 years ago
“This subway is fantastic! The lines are typically long but they depend solely on how recently a class change occurred. The crown jewel of this subway, and campus, is the sandwich artist Levi. Levi goes above and beyond in his sandwich making passion. He has made me the best Subway subs I have ever had and I have complete confidence in him everytime I come. I actually exclusively get sandwiches from Subway when Levi is working due to the supreme craftsmanship he offers. Best. Subway. Ever.”
- The Central Courtyard Fountain
Matthew Spohr
2 stars
3 years ago
“There aren't even any slides and security usually kicks you out before you've even had a chance to get wet. Would give one star, but sometimes there are ducks.”
- Lot H Parking
Nic
5 stars
1 year ago
“Honestly, I would raise my family in lot H if I could afford the day rates. Nothing makes me smile quite like browsing for a parking stall in lot H.”
Yuri Grozenok
5 stars
1 year ago
“It's all about lot H. Don't even think about going somewhere else. Once you go H, you never go back.
Kinda like heroin.”
- Pritchard
Matiss Brants
1 star
3 weeks ago
“slider..... you want slider..... no......you said yes? ........no.... ok yes you get slider. Slider not a choice but a lifestyle”
booqeefio2 booce
5 stars
3 weeks ago
“Pritchard is one of the greatest locations on Campus, if not the province of British Columbia or Canada as a whole.
They meticulously arrange for within their delectables, all maintained solely to the most prestigious standards.
A commoner might perceive their offerings as merely "food", but such is the bourgeoisie interpretation and one truly and necessarily must broaden their view to really spectate the tastes of the spectrum in the cutting edge culinary arts which Pritchard provides for.
They serve not "food", but rather esteemed dreams and raw vigorous passion to flabbergast your ingresses and overwhelm the senses.
When they grant you a "chicken slider with fries", they push the boundaries and bring out a completely new phantasmagoric dimension in their fabrication. Only in a surface level analysis would one state their chicken to be “raw and burnt” and their fries “flavorless”, when the truth couldn’t be farther from such.
They blacken their chicken to infuse the tastes of 36 carcinogens into the charred piece of poultry, and yet punctiliously somehow are also able to have a delicate pinkess the likes of salmon within the ‘grimed’ exterior which only brings out a delightful medium rare chicken flavour- what you might call ‘raw’ is actually what upon tasting, transports the taster to the great vastness of a majestic grasslands where the capon saw it’s life and upbringing, only to then be sacrificed to the greater good and be placed within a “slider” with a ‘weightless’ and airy complementation of mayonnaise and a bread kneaded with wholest of steel milled grain for your indulgence.
When a dish possesses such greatness such that it doesn’t convey mere flavour but rather tells you a tale, it is clear that it has reached perfection and adding further to it would only take away rather than add, this is why there is no need for “seasoning” or “salt”.
The fries share this commonality, when you have the juiciest of russets that undergo the maillard reaction with canola oil pressed from the finest rapeseed at blisteringly heated temperatures, why must one hinder this orchestration with “salt” when it would just blockade this established eminence of genius?
Surely the paysan that is amogus would point to a plethora of what may seem to be other shortcomings in this system of communal dining that would enliven even Marx. Why are the portions so tiny? Such that you can focus on the magnified fineness of the limited food put in forth. Why is the selection so small and keeps repeating? What you call “repetition” is what they regard as consistency, a crucial boon to behold in the food industry such that diners can always be delivered only the most scrumptious morsels every single time, furthermore a smaller selection allows you to again zoom in on the intricacies of the dish in question as the reality is that we homo sapiens are rather unfortunately unable to truly comprehend the higher order flavour combinations of different culminations. Why are the berries frozen hard? “Frozen” is perhaps the wrong word to utilize, instead the drupelets are of the ‘gelée’ variety and are more so complemented by the crystalline structures that dihydrogen monoxides forms upon reaching sufficiently low temperatures, and this unlocks an unprecedented textural experience that gells well with the illusively whitened and tranquilly-flowing yoghurt.
Overall, the Pritchard is not a mere eatery for those of the serfdom and the elevated and elaborate flavour machinations are simply not catered to those who cannot and will not perceive them.
What you get here is a roller coaster ride of ups and downs of the supremest sensations of the culinary arts that stretches beyond what a commoner could remotely imagine to predict.
Mark my words, the Pritchard Dining Hall perhaps holds a state of controversy in its current state, but it will without a doubt cement itself in time and we shall be looking back at it as a retrospective in the future, pondering over how it had brought a new revolution that would have forever changed the way we human beings consume.”
The last google review I found was a tense interaction between the “owner” of The Well who has responded to the bashing critiques of reviewers. Some reviewers have even responded to the “owner.”
Jordan Singh
1 star
1 year ago
“Nobody wants to eat or work here. Sales are only because it is the only option on campus after 9, even then it's only frozen pizzas. Avoid at all costs.”
Response from the “owner”:
9 months ago
“Hello Jordan,
Once again I have no idea what you're talking about.
I am drowning in resumes from people that want to work in the Well. Our sales are up 25-30% this year despite more options open later.
Including other food options just off campus as well.
Our pizzas are never frozen so that's just an outright lie. Our ingredients are fresh from Sysco and our pizza crusts are delivered fresh 5 days a week from a local bakery. I take pride in the hard work the employees in the Well deliver everyday.
Sorry your attempt to troll us with lies didn't work today.
Also, if you have any issues you should try approaching a manager to understand how some things operate.”
[Jordan’s] response: “All you say is lies, I have watched the frozen dough emerge from the freezer. All my friends have reported illnesses after eating there. Do not lure people into the trap for the sake of us poor students.”
--
1 star
2 years ago
“Claims they have breakfast until 11am. I asked for Eggs Benedict at 10:55 am (after my class), they said breakfast hours were over even though it was still before 11am.”
Response from the “owner”:
2 years ago
“I'm not sure why that stands for a 1 star review.
When it comes to Eggs Benny we do not [have] any more sauce when we run out so if we have a lot of Benny orders in the morning sometimes they go quicker. For that menu item at least.
Reply to Response from the “owner”:
It is a 1 star reviews because employee told me [they] stop serving "breakfast" because they put it away, not because they ran out of hollandaise sauce.”
EP VS CENT BOXING MATCH
1 star
1 year ago
“You can tell the owner is lying in all of his responses to other reviews, nice try.”
Response from the “owner”:
1 year ago
“It would be good to point out at this juncture that there is no "owner" of the Well. You should inform yourself more about us.”
If you have a comment you would like to share about anywhere on campus, go ahead and write a review! You could be saving students who are potentially about to make the worst mistake of their UBCO career, or you could be encouraging them to choose the path that will ultimately make them happy and satisfied.
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